Listen! Do you smell something?

So I'm not sure what to do or what to think. Life has been going in a way best described as not downward for a little while now and it's something that I'm so unused to that it seems...wrong. I'm a little scared I don't mind telling you.

As best I can determine it kind of started at the beginning of the year. My boss' boss saw that I was basically about to quit and reordered my job so that I got moved away from the guy that everyone hates and reported directly to him instead. Good. Then I moved again to a much nicer office. Good. Then I not only survived the lay-offs I came out of it pretty much promoted and given the opportunity, albeit through hard work and some difficulty, to really shine. Pretty damn good.

Then I finally found a place that would not only approve me for a lease but wasn't a place I felt like I was settling for. I move this week to a place that is neither small nor dirty nor in a manky neighborhood nor way out in the middle of nowhere. I actually like the place and they approved me. I think maybe one or two of you know the full story about my fall from grace and resultant struggle to pull myself back out of the muck so let me just say that this is more than a big deal. This is huge. Huger than I can say without going into the whole story, which I'm not going to do.

For the first time in so long I can barely remember it, the future is not completely bereft of light. I don't feel like I'm drowning in abject misery all day everyday. Sometimes I even smile a bit. It's odd I know but it's true. I was there. I felt it happen.

Paranoia is of course quite high. Every time I start to step up I tend to get swatted back down harder than the last time. I can't take that. Not again. Think happy thoughts, everyone. There appears to be light at the end of the tunnel. I sincerely hope it's sunshine.

All you need in life is a little place for your stuff.

I woke up this morning and the first thing that greeted me was news that George Carlin had died. What can you say about ol' George that hasn't been said already? Not much. All I can really say is that he was and will ever be my favorite comic ever. The very first time I ever heard him he made me laugh so hard that I stopped breathing. Literally. Over the course of many years I watched many HBO specials and listened to many albums and read his three books and he never failed to make me laugh and think.

Rest in peace, George. There will never be another like you.

Ain't life grand?

We just got finished with a bloodbath at my company. Many many people let go, pretty much at random. The decisions came from the corporate office and to them we're all just a bunch of faceless names on a a sheet of paper. They show up, axe a bunch of people and move to the next location to repeat the carnage. It has not been a pleasant time for anyone.

I survived the reaping intact but now I have two jobs. Literally. They chopped one guy in my department and ALL of his work has landed squarely on my desk. Still just the one paycheck though. Two jobs to one check is a bad ratio. I'm going to have to go ahead and come out firmly against it.

Bleh. I'll make it work and get it organized to within an inch of its life so that no one will miss him (on a work level anyway, I assume some people will miss him personally. I hear that's what normal people do.) I'm already being told what a wonderful job I'm doing by all and sundry and that I'm already doing his job better than he did. This doesn't fill me with confidence though. Considering that the last bunch of folks to get axed were mostly picked using the throw darts at a list of names method does it matter how well I do my job?

Companies ask what happened to employee loyalty. That shit works both ways, people.

Re: Elections

Dear Hillary Clinton,

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Sincerely,

Me

One must wonder how one the biggest, most irrational egos I've ever seen deals with having to admit that it lost. I bet there were tears. Huge hysterical tears. Hehehe.

Where the hell have I been?

Yikes. It's been a minute or two, huh? I haven't been on hardly at all the last month or so. I've been trying to catching up on a combination of reading, writing and DVD watching. While I've been successful at that I've been neglecting this. BOOOOO!!!

Indeed. Boo.

I think this is the part where I make some halfassed comment about trying harder and doing better and similar. So yeah. I'll get right on that.

I do actually have some stuff put down on here so fear not ye faithful few. More sextacular words by me are forthcoming.

Who put this on?

It's on random!

I haven't updated for a ridiculous amount of time but I have good reasons, none of which I'm going to share. Neener.

How miserable do you think the very first gay person was? Think about it.

Did you ever notice that every time a rock station does a promo for itself it ALWAYS goes like this:
"We play the rock!"
*snippet from song you like*
"The rock!!"
*snippet from song you really like*
"THE ROCK!!"
*snippet from song you love*
THE ROCK!! NOW!!"
*plays absolutely shitty song you hate in its entirety*

I'm given to understand that I really am engaged now. I'm going to need some of you to attend or my side of the audience is going to look pretty pathetic. I'll keep you posted.

It bugs the ever lovin' shit out of me that Saturday is called Saturday. It completely clashes with the other days of the week. A day each for the sun and moon. Fine. Then days, in order, for Tyr, Odin, Thor and Frigg. ALL Norse. Then a day for Saturn. A roman titan. What the fuck, man? I demand that this be changed before it causes my head to explode. I've been stressing over it since childhood and I can't take much more. Write to your congressman.

It really pisses me off when people end every other sentence with "right now." I am so tired right now. I am really upset right now. I am so confused right now. Listen people, we all understand that you're talking about the present. If you just say "I am so tired." we won't assume you meant last week or three day from now. Y'see the fact that you said "I am" indicates the present tense. We don't need further clarification. Knock it the fuck off. Right now.

WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

Did you ever notice that if a piece of chocolate melts and then sets up again it tastes completely different? What's that all about?

Stop pronouncing the W in sword. It makes you sound like a moron and it pisses me off. Don't ask me why because I don't know, it just does.

Have you ever stared at the sky until it frightens you? Try it, it's awesome.

So far this year I have seen 53 movies from credits to credits. I have no idea how many partials. I watch a lot of partials.

I put my pants on both legs at once. Out of spite.

Once is happenstance, twice is coincidence...

How is it that when I sign another blood pact with Taco about writing that I get an email telling me that one of my favorite small press publishers is taking applicants now for its yearly boot camp for writers? I suspect polar bears are involved somehow, as they usually are. I will now try to find ways to make fire be the answer I'm looking for.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled web browsing.