So baffling I don't have words for it

My auto insurance company sent me a check. Not a bill, a check. Recent changes on my policy made my bill go down and they sent me a check to cover the overpayment. An insurance company sent a check. Unasked for. I am utterly confused by this turn of events. I cashed it this morning so it was definitely a real check. From an insurance company.

I think I need to have a lie down over this whole thing. But first, a couple of updates!

Toby is not thriving. He looks sickly. I moved him outside (and changed his name accordingly) to see if he'll flourish there. Let's hope or else there will be amputations.

I had a doctor's appointment last Friday and I've dropped more weight. This is good. Very good indeed.

And just for Taco, see what I got here? It's a new special edition of Dark City. SAY THAT YOU LOVE IT! SAY IT!

As you were.

Paging Dr. Clitterhouse

So yeah, not really random and not really massive updatey goodness but maybe the lovechild of those two.

LOVECHILD! NEVER MEANT TO BE!

*ahem*

Right then, I've been moved into the new place for a few weeks now and I likes it. You never can tell how much you truly missed the quiet until you get it back. The new TV is exerting some kind of strange power over me. Sometimes I have to resist the urge to just turn it on and stare at it. It might be evil. I wouldn't get rid of it for that, I'm just sayin' if I disappear that's where you should look for me, Poltergeist-Carol Ann style.

I got a big ass plant for the place now. It's a kind of palm tree that I named Toby. I'd tell you why I named it that but it's the kind of thing that's really only funny if you have no sense of right and wrong. I thought it was hysterical. It also made me realize that I need more plants.

I realized that I don't own any porn. At all. None. That can't be healthy. fett was supposed to supply me with nun porn but did he? Did he!? NO!

I still have nothing hanging on the walls. Still. I have things to hang, I just haven't put them up. I'm a lazy, lazy man.

Again with the uproar for the new Madden? No thanks. I've played Madden since the very beginning and I have no interest. One thing I've learned is that whoever the actual Madden is gaga over will be unbeatable in the game. So if you don't pick New England and you play them, they will smash you and I am NOT picking them. I got NCAA '09 instead.

Speaking of football, it's almost here. GET EXCITED, BITCHES!

Taco, your brother says you're a dirty filthy liar and he denies all knowledge of the incident in question.

I finally managed to track down and purchase the only book I didn't own by my favorite author. It's been out of print for long and long and every time I've seen it for sale, always online, it's either outrageously priced or held together with spit and hope. I got it used but in damn fine condition. I am extremely well pleased by this. A few of you can kind of imagine my level of yay over it.

After adding up my trade-ins and applying them I paid $2.16 for my copy of Spaced. So not only do I finally own it, I only paid 2 bucks for it brand new. Sometimes life forgets to shit on you and it is good.

After much begging and coercing my company has moved a bunch of us to 4 day work weeks. The savings on gas alone are more than worth the extra long four days. Plus having off every Monday does NOT suck. Lounging around reading or watching movies while everyone else is at work makes me happy in the pant covered area. If I wore pants. Which I don't. Cast off the fabric chains of the oppressor!

Lately I've been telling everyone I'm hung like an elevator button. No one else seems to think it's funny. Heathens, one and all.

How is it that there are only two weeks between the spring and autumn softball leagues? Can I get a rest!? No? Fine!

I went through my books while I was unpacking them after the move to do a great purge like I've been threatening to do for some time now. I took out 203 books which will get donated to this thing I support. I think my book buying might, might, be a bit out of hand when I can pick out 200+ books to give away and still have 7 full shelves. I probably have about a thousand left. I figure as long as I own a book I haven't read I can never die. At this rate I'll live for...ever actually.

I miss Toby.

I think a friend of mine is going to ask me out pretty soon. I've been celibate, by choice, for the last five years. I'm not sure how I feel about this whole situation. Clearly I'll have to find a way for Mario Kart to decide what I should do.

Seriously, elevator button. It's shameful.

There was other stuff I wanted to talk about but I've forgotten all of it. Ah memory, you dodgy old bird.

Five by five

Really just touching base as I'm still a little too tired for anything involved or requiring, y'know, thinking.

I finished unpacking all my stuff and getting my books organized on their shelves again. That by itself is a whole process that has a life of its own. I set aside 203 books to find new homes for and decided to just give them to a charity for children which will sell them and use the money for food and clothes and stuff. I know what it's like to be a poor kid and it's not pleasant.

I'm this close to talking Taco into visiting soon. Once I get him in a real city he'll never want to leave. One at a time, I'll get you all. I am not patient by nature but I can wait. I can wait...

The bikes on Mario Kart are still kicking my ass.

I finally got back to my normal sleeping pattern of not enough instead of none at all. Is there some secret to getting more? It seems that most people sleep quite well. What am I doing wrong?

IYK has a crusty gine. Pass it on.

Spaced is finally out on DVD here. What the hell took them so long?

I really need to quit caffeine. It'll be brutal and painful. Much like being in a relationship.

That's all the time we have today. Tune in next time for what we hope will be a real post.

Listen! Do you smell something?

So I'm not sure what to do or what to think. Life has been going in a way best described as not downward for a little while now and it's something that I'm so unused to that it seems...wrong. I'm a little scared I don't mind telling you.

As best I can determine it kind of started at the beginning of the year. My boss' boss saw that I was basically about to quit and reordered my job so that I got moved away from the guy that everyone hates and reported directly to him instead. Good. Then I moved again to a much nicer office. Good. Then I not only survived the lay-offs I came out of it pretty much promoted and given the opportunity, albeit through hard work and some difficulty, to really shine. Pretty damn good.

Then I finally found a place that would not only approve me for a lease but wasn't a place I felt like I was settling for. I move this week to a place that is neither small nor dirty nor in a manky neighborhood nor way out in the middle of nowhere. I actually like the place and they approved me. I think maybe one or two of you know the full story about my fall from grace and resultant struggle to pull myself back out of the muck so let me just say that this is more than a big deal. This is huge. Huger than I can say without going into the whole story, which I'm not going to do.

For the first time in so long I can barely remember it, the future is not completely bereft of light. I don't feel like I'm drowning in abject misery all day everyday. Sometimes I even smile a bit. It's odd I know but it's true. I was there. I felt it happen.

Paranoia is of course quite high. Every time I start to step up I tend to get swatted back down harder than the last time. I can't take that. Not again. Think happy thoughts, everyone. There appears to be light at the end of the tunnel. I sincerely hope it's sunshine.

All you need in life is a little place for your stuff.

I woke up this morning and the first thing that greeted me was news that George Carlin had died. What can you say about ol' George that hasn't been said already? Not much. All I can really say is that he was and will ever be my favorite comic ever. The very first time I ever heard him he made me laugh so hard that I stopped breathing. Literally. Over the course of many years I watched many HBO specials and listened to many albums and read his three books and he never failed to make me laugh and think.

Rest in peace, George. There will never be another like you.

Ain't life grand?

We just got finished with a bloodbath at my company. Many many people let go, pretty much at random. The decisions came from the corporate office and to them we're all just a bunch of faceless names on a a sheet of paper. They show up, axe a bunch of people and move to the next location to repeat the carnage. It has not been a pleasant time for anyone.

I survived the reaping intact but now I have two jobs. Literally. They chopped one guy in my department and ALL of his work has landed squarely on my desk. Still just the one paycheck though. Two jobs to one check is a bad ratio. I'm going to have to go ahead and come out firmly against it.

Bleh. I'll make it work and get it organized to within an inch of its life so that no one will miss him (on a work level anyway, I assume some people will miss him personally. I hear that's what normal people do.) I'm already being told what a wonderful job I'm doing by all and sundry and that I'm already doing his job better than he did. This doesn't fill me with confidence though. Considering that the last bunch of folks to get axed were mostly picked using the throw darts at a list of names method does it matter how well I do my job?

Companies ask what happened to employee loyalty. That shit works both ways, people.

Re: Elections

Dear Hillary Clinton,

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Sincerely,

Me

One must wonder how one the biggest, most irrational egos I've ever seen deals with having to admit that it lost. I bet there were tears. Huge hysterical tears. Hehehe.