Last year was a slow year for me for movies. Saw only 119 (it's hard to get out to the movies when you're a shiftless layabout) so there will be some gaps here. Netflix will help me catch up soon enough. Anyway, on to it and obviously worded to avoid spoilers, which I hate.
The best movie that came out last year was The Hurt Locker. Your differing opinion is wrong. Change it. It not only has no weak spots, it is strong in every area. Writing, directing (Katherine Bigelow should win every directing award there is this year), acting, editing, everything is top notch. As I said before someone finally made a movie about the war in Iraq that didn't suck. The tension ramps up right from the get go and never subsides. This movie makes you feel tense and anxious the entire time it's running. Jeremy Renner playing the adrenaline junkie bomb squad leader is, not to be a cliche but it's true, a revelation. I've been tracking down other movies he's in that I missed just to watch him work. This is THE movie to see from last year, hands down, bar none.
Next is District 9, a movie that got you in by pretending to be an sf action movie but turned out to be a complex study of bigotry. Not to say there was no action, there was, but even that was better than normal. This movie featured perhaps the best screenplay of the year. Can't wait to see more from both the director and star.
I'll admit to a bias for Sam Rockwell but Moon really is as good as I think it is. Rockwell plays a psychologically stressed astronaut on a mission to the moon. Alone. Maybe. He thinks. He makes a discovery and then, well then it goes from very good to great.
In comedy you have The Hangover which successfully walked the line of crude and smart where most just flop into crude and stupid. This is one of those rare movies that causes genuine full out laughter again and again while you watch it and unlike a lot of movie the humor holds up on repeat viewings.
You don't get a lot of horror that's actually scary but Paranormal Activity got to me. This is exactly my kind of horror. Don't show me a lot, let me fill in the blanks mentally, build tension slowly and make me feel actual dread for the characters and, later at home in the dark, for myself. Take note Hollywood, there's a reason this movie crushed the latest Saw shitfest. Try to learn from it and not fuck it up.
Other (very) worthy releases:
The Imaginarium of Dr Parnassus
Zombieland (the cameo alone is worth t he price of admission)
In The Loop
Coraline
An Education
Precious
Adventureland
(500) Days of Summer
Notable misses (refer back to shiftless layabout status) to be caught on DVD that I have high hopes for:
Up In The Air
A serious Man
Where The Wild Things Are
Fantastic Mr. Fox
Up
Extract
The Informant!
OK I saved some space to talk about Avatar and the madness that is swirling around it. To get it out of the way, I saw it and liked it. Visually it's spectacular and like nothing you've ever seen since the tech that was used to make it was invented specifically TO make it.
However...
First it was nominated and then won the Golden Globe for best drama (congrats Globes, you've just lost ALL your credibility) and now is nominated for best picture at the Oscars. Granted the Oscars lost all their cred long ago so this was an expected thing for them, but still. A note to both these orgs and people everywhere, huge box office does NOT equal quality. The story was nothing you haven't seen before (literally if you've seen things like Dances With Wolves, Medicine Man, etc), the writing in not particularly notable, the directing is standard action movie directing and so is the acting. There is utterly no reason this movie should be in conversations about best movie of the year. No reason and no excuse. It's Titanic all over again. Huge box office drives what is basically a mediocre movie to steal awards away from truly deserving films.
Friday, February 12, 2010
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Reading '09
I wasn't going to do these this year but looking at too many shitty lists and yelling at them is forcing me. Plus I'm pretty sure Taco would make that sad face he makes and I just can't have that.
I'll start with a longtime favorite of mine, Dan Simmons and his novel Drood. It's a fictionalized account of the final years of the life of Charles Dickens when he went a bit wonky. It's narrated (very unreliably) by Wilkie Collins who was a popular writer of the time (and should be more widely read now) and was a friend (and enemy) of Dickens. Since this is a Simmons novel it's not just historical fiction but is dark and disturbing and complex and weird beyond measure. There is also no need to like Dickens or to have even read a single word he ever wrote. Simmons, you can do no wrong.
Next is Margaret Atwood's The Year of the Flood. It's a follow up to her excellent Oryx and Crake, a post-apocalyptic dystopian wonderland. Read both of these and thank me later.
Chronic City by Jonathan Lethem is a kind of alternate reality story of Manhattan (ugh, New York) that makes wonderful use of magical realism (yay!). Not very plot heavy it more uses its characters and weird and yummy writing to drive it.
What to say about Lev Grossman's The Magicians that will do it justice? Well since it's about people going to a school of magic it draws comparison's to Harry Potter but it's nothing like that. This is very much not for kids. It's part love letter to fantasy tales like Narnia and Oz and part study of what it's like to want something so badly it makes you feel like you're dying and even when you get it, it's still not enough.
Incognito by Ed Brubaker. A supervillain forced to go into witness protection told in Brubaker's style? Yes please.
The Unwritten by Mike Carey. Fantasy + speculative literary geography + dark fantasy + metafiction + ...yeah just pick up the first collection and read it, it's too much to try to blurb about.
Other (very) worthy releases:
The Red Tree - Caitlin R. Kiernan
Dark Places - Gillian Flynn
The Domino Men - Jonathan Barnes
The Mystic Arts of Erasing All Signs of Death - Charlie Huston
Breathers - S. G. Browne
The Financial Lives of the Poets - Jess Walter
And many many more. Get reading, slackers.
I'll start with a longtime favorite of mine, Dan Simmons and his novel Drood. It's a fictionalized account of the final years of the life of Charles Dickens when he went a bit wonky. It's narrated (very unreliably) by Wilkie Collins who was a popular writer of the time (and should be more widely read now) and was a friend (and enemy) of Dickens. Since this is a Simmons novel it's not just historical fiction but is dark and disturbing and complex and weird beyond measure. There is also no need to like Dickens or to have even read a single word he ever wrote. Simmons, you can do no wrong.
Next is Margaret Atwood's The Year of the Flood. It's a follow up to her excellent Oryx and Crake, a post-apocalyptic dystopian wonderland. Read both of these and thank me later.
Chronic City by Jonathan Lethem is a kind of alternate reality story of Manhattan (ugh, New York) that makes wonderful use of magical realism (yay!). Not very plot heavy it more uses its characters and weird and yummy writing to drive it.
What to say about Lev Grossman's The Magicians that will do it justice? Well since it's about people going to a school of magic it draws comparison's to Harry Potter but it's nothing like that. This is very much not for kids. It's part love letter to fantasy tales like Narnia and Oz and part study of what it's like to want something so badly it makes you feel like you're dying and even when you get it, it's still not enough.
Incognito by Ed Brubaker. A supervillain forced to go into witness protection told in Brubaker's style? Yes please.
The Unwritten by Mike Carey. Fantasy + speculative literary geography + dark fantasy + metafiction + ...yeah just pick up the first collection and read it, it's too much to try to blurb about.
Other (very) worthy releases:
The Red Tree - Caitlin R. Kiernan
Dark Places - Gillian Flynn
The Domino Men - Jonathan Barnes
The Mystic Arts of Erasing All Signs of Death - Charlie Huston
Breathers - S. G. Browne
The Financial Lives of the Poets - Jess Walter
And many many more. Get reading, slackers.
Monday, January 11, 2010
At least Im not pissing in your houseplants
So I was thinking the other day about bodily functions. Specifically those that people feel they have to respond to with their words. I find the whole thing ridiculous and as such have come up with something to show exactly how ridiculous I think it is. Details below!
First you have burping which everyone does and everyone seems to think is rude and expects you to excuse yourself for. Utter nonsense. How is it rude to do something that EVERYONE does and that no one has any control over doing? It's like apologizing or expecting someone to apologize to you for having to pee. Oh I'm sorry! I had to go to the bathroom! How rude of me! It's idiocy. Admit it.
Next we have sneezing and everyone's desire to bless me and have me in turn bless them every time it happens. Talk about dumb. Look up all the various things that are put forward as the origin of it and none of them make a lick of sense in the 21st century. Are there really still people who think their souls get ejected from their bodies when they sneeze? How about that they spit out their sins or evil spirits and they have to be blessed lest they jump back in and so on and so on? Doing something because it's been done for a long time is a seriously fucking stupid reason to do anything let alone something that didn't make a whole lot of sense in the first place. And not to start a theological thing but what about those of us that don't want your or your god's blessing? Keep it to yourself, thanks.
Anyway, for the last few days I've been barking at people when they sneeze or after I burp. It's no more ridiculous than the stuff they expect and instead of irritating me for being illogical and stupid it makes me giggle because I do love a bit of light absurdity in my day when I can get it.
Woof.
First you have burping which everyone does and everyone seems to think is rude and expects you to excuse yourself for. Utter nonsense. How is it rude to do something that EVERYONE does and that no one has any control over doing? It's like apologizing or expecting someone to apologize to you for having to pee. Oh I'm sorry! I had to go to the bathroom! How rude of me! It's idiocy. Admit it.
Next we have sneezing and everyone's desire to bless me and have me in turn bless them every time it happens. Talk about dumb. Look up all the various things that are put forward as the origin of it and none of them make a lick of sense in the 21st century. Are there really still people who think their souls get ejected from their bodies when they sneeze? How about that they spit out their sins or evil spirits and they have to be blessed lest they jump back in and so on and so on? Doing something because it's been done for a long time is a seriously fucking stupid reason to do anything let alone something that didn't make a whole lot of sense in the first place. And not to start a theological thing but what about those of us that don't want your or your god's blessing? Keep it to yourself, thanks.
Anyway, for the last few days I've been barking at people when they sneeze or after I burp. It's no more ridiculous than the stuff they expect and instead of irritating me for being illogical and stupid it makes me giggle because I do love a bit of light absurdity in my day when I can get it.
Woof.
Monday, December 28, 2009
And we're back
I haven't really been in the mood to share anything since I became a shiftless layabout but I figure it's time to get back on the horse and start typing away. Let's start with something easy. People who are annoying me.
Thankfully christmas is over (see previous posts for my thoughts about all that, I'm not getting into it again here) but I was just reminded that New Year's Eve is still forthcoming and with it the inevitable stupid people and drunk drivers killing lots of other people. That made me think of something else that's been annoying the piss out of me for the last month or so.
Best of the decade lists.
I'm going to explain it again so please listen this time. The decade is NOT over until the end of next year. I went through all this with people when the whole 2000 thing came around. 2000 was not the beginning of the new millennium, 2001 was. Therefore 2000 was also not the beginning of the new century or the new decade. It's simple math, people. You start counting at 1, not zero so the decade began in 2001 and will end in 2010. Save your mostly shitty best of the decade lists until the decade is actually winding down will ya?
Irritating bastards...
Thankfully christmas is over (see previous posts for my thoughts about all that, I'm not getting into it again here) but I was just reminded that New Year's Eve is still forthcoming and with it the inevitable stupid people and drunk drivers killing lots of other people. That made me think of something else that's been annoying the piss out of me for the last month or so.
Best of the decade lists.
I'm going to explain it again so please listen this time. The decade is NOT over until the end of next year. I went through all this with people when the whole 2000 thing came around. 2000 was not the beginning of the new millennium, 2001 was. Therefore 2000 was also not the beginning of the new century or the new decade. It's simple math, people. You start counting at 1, not zero so the decade began in 2001 and will end in 2010. Save your mostly shitty best of the decade lists until the decade is actually winding down will ya?
Irritating bastards...
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
I will shoot you SO HARD!
So Taco came to visit last weekend. I was hoping he'd do an entry about it so I wouldn't have to, y'know, write but it looks like it's not gonna happen. I'll do a boring one now and force him to do a better one. I call this plan good.
Of course the first thing I did was get him in the house and hustle him up to the library. I figured that would be my best chance to get hooks in him so he'd never leave. Showed off some autographs and numbered limited editions and so on and so forth. He seemed interested but then he could have been just acting. I can never tell. He did touch the battle armor of the Divine Ray and received his holy blessing though, so there's that. Jack wasn't impressed at all. I don't know what he reads but my stuff wasn't doing it for him.
Off we went then to the comic book store. In my infinite absentmindedness (senility?) I forgot we had a dog in the car until we were 3 minutes from the place. So that part of the visit was a bomb. Can't take the dog in, can't leave him in the car. I am a dumbass. Hopefully the next bit will go better.
We fly down the road to the crab place where I pick up the order and hustle back to the house. One of the many benefits of getting crabs is that they make your car smell like them for quite a while afterwards. We get back and set it all up and I prepare to piledrive Taco's tastebuds.
Did you know they boil crabs where he's from? Fucking. Disgusting.
Anyway we undertook the holy ritual of eating crabs and all was good and blissful. Some things never fail and this is one of them. I showed him the proper way to do it and off we went to taste-heaven. Surely this would make him stay forever? I know it would work on me.
After this there was lots of talking and laughing, it's been quite a while since we've actually seen each other y'know and that stuff piles up I think. I hit him with a copy of Dark City (it's a good movie, damn you!) and chased him with a copy of Hot Fuzz (WATCH IT!). If only I had a Bluray of Goonies I could have beaten him quite mercilessly with it. We watched Epitaph One off the Dollhouse season 1 discs and decided that a lot of things made more sense because of it but that people who hadn't seen it might be confused in short order.
More talking and laughing, not unlike a couple of giggling girls.
I managed not to duct tape him to the wall in his sleep, which I feel was very big of me, figuring he'd stay of his own volition. The invisible thing that opens the downstairs bathroom door at night even took a break while he was here though of course he's started up again now that we're alone in the house once more. The next day there was more talking and laughing and I finally got sweet revenge on Mario Kart. Turns out I'm much better at it when I'm sober.
*flex*
Then he left! Is there no power on earth to make them stay? It appears not. Then I was a sad panda. But then my beloved Ravens won and Rosalita took the leftover crabs and made this thing which I forget the name of but there was sauce and noodle and yummy so then I was back to just pining like usual.
Anyway, I imagine I was a very poor host. I'm not very good at things like that. I hope it won't prevent further visits though because in all I think it was quite fun though my description is lacking. I fear I haven't the mental energy for my usual energetic rambling. I guess someone else will have to do it.
NOT IT!
Of course the first thing I did was get him in the house and hustle him up to the library. I figured that would be my best chance to get hooks in him so he'd never leave. Showed off some autographs and numbered limited editions and so on and so forth. He seemed interested but then he could have been just acting. I can never tell. He did touch the battle armor of the Divine Ray and received his holy blessing though, so there's that. Jack wasn't impressed at all. I don't know what he reads but my stuff wasn't doing it for him.
Off we went then to the comic book store. In my infinite absentmindedness (senility?) I forgot we had a dog in the car until we were 3 minutes from the place. So that part of the visit was a bomb. Can't take the dog in, can't leave him in the car. I am a dumbass. Hopefully the next bit will go better.
We fly down the road to the crab place where I pick up the order and hustle back to the house. One of the many benefits of getting crabs is that they make your car smell like them for quite a while afterwards. We get back and set it all up and I prepare to piledrive Taco's tastebuds.
Did you know they boil crabs where he's from? Fucking. Disgusting.
Anyway we undertook the holy ritual of eating crabs and all was good and blissful. Some things never fail and this is one of them. I showed him the proper way to do it and off we went to taste-heaven. Surely this would make him stay forever? I know it would work on me.
After this there was lots of talking and laughing, it's been quite a while since we've actually seen each other y'know and that stuff piles up I think. I hit him with a copy of Dark City (it's a good movie, damn you!) and chased him with a copy of Hot Fuzz (WATCH IT!). If only I had a Bluray of Goonies I could have beaten him quite mercilessly with it. We watched Epitaph One off the Dollhouse season 1 discs and decided that a lot of things made more sense because of it but that people who hadn't seen it might be confused in short order.
More talking and laughing, not unlike a couple of giggling girls.
I managed not to duct tape him to the wall in his sleep, which I feel was very big of me, figuring he'd stay of his own volition. The invisible thing that opens the downstairs bathroom door at night even took a break while he was here though of course he's started up again now that we're alone in the house once more. The next day there was more talking and laughing and I finally got sweet revenge on Mario Kart. Turns out I'm much better at it when I'm sober.
*flex*
Then he left! Is there no power on earth to make them stay? It appears not. Then I was a sad panda. But then my beloved Ravens won and Rosalita took the leftover crabs and made this thing which I forget the name of but there was sauce and noodle and yummy so then I was back to just pining like usual.
Anyway, I imagine I was a very poor host. I'm not very good at things like that. I hope it won't prevent further visits though because in all I think it was quite fun though my description is lacking. I fear I haven't the mental energy for my usual energetic rambling. I guess someone else will have to do it.
NOT IT!
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
You I'll not follow
So I'm driving home today and I finally heard it. The new Alice in Chains song.
Wow. Just...wow.
I understand the desire the surviving members must have to make more music and even the desire to work together again but this shit is just wrong. The new singer, no idea who it is and I'm not going to waste time trying to find out, is trying his hardest to sound like Layne Staley. You might remember that Layne Staley was the original singer and, in my not at all humble opinion the most talented member of the group prior to his untimely and much lamented death. His voice was like a soul being tormented in the worst part of hell expelling lyrics that made you feel exactly what that felt like (I speak primarily about those songs whose lyrics Staley wrote himself or wrote the lion's share of. Just listen to an AiC CD and you'll figure out which is which.)
Now you have some random guy doing a second rate Staley impersonation. It's fucking sick. I have lost all respect for the other members of that band. How anyone could ever think this was a good idea is beyond me. Form a new band with a new singer and then find the sound of that band. Don't spit on Staley's memory by hiring some no talent wannabe and then trying really hard, and failing, to sound like Alice in Chains. Henceforth I will only refer to this abomination as Jerry Cantrell's Band.
Cantrell, you're a piece of shit. Truly.
Then against my better judgement I tried to actually listen to the song. Imagine if your ears had balls and then got got kicked in the balls in your ears. It's like that. A wildly overproduced, poorly written piece of offal. That guy can try, and Cantrell and company can work the boards to help him try to sound like Layne but you'll never fool a real fan. Layne would never sing a song with lyrics that are Nickelback level insipid and include the word California in them, what, 9000 times. Did you bring in Anthony Kiedis to give a rewrite to your Nickelback songs?
The three surviving members of AiC who are currently in Jerry Cantrell's Band clearly have no respect for Layne, no respect for AiC fans and no respect for themselves. I've never wanted an album to bomb so badly in my life.
The entire thing makes me feel sick. If you'll excuse me I have to go listen to Dirt about a million fucking times to wash the foulness out of my ears and hopefully off my brain.
Wow. Just...wow.
I understand the desire the surviving members must have to make more music and even the desire to work together again but this shit is just wrong. The new singer, no idea who it is and I'm not going to waste time trying to find out, is trying his hardest to sound like Layne Staley. You might remember that Layne Staley was the original singer and, in my not at all humble opinion the most talented member of the group prior to his untimely and much lamented death. His voice was like a soul being tormented in the worst part of hell expelling lyrics that made you feel exactly what that felt like (I speak primarily about those songs whose lyrics Staley wrote himself or wrote the lion's share of. Just listen to an AiC CD and you'll figure out which is which.)
Now you have some random guy doing a second rate Staley impersonation. It's fucking sick. I have lost all respect for the other members of that band. How anyone could ever think this was a good idea is beyond me. Form a new band with a new singer and then find the sound of that band. Don't spit on Staley's memory by hiring some no talent wannabe and then trying really hard, and failing, to sound like Alice in Chains. Henceforth I will only refer to this abomination as Jerry Cantrell's Band.
Cantrell, you're a piece of shit. Truly.
Then against my better judgement I tried to actually listen to the song. Imagine if your ears had balls and then got got kicked in the balls in your ears. It's like that. A wildly overproduced, poorly written piece of offal. That guy can try, and Cantrell and company can work the boards to help him try to sound like Layne but you'll never fool a real fan. Layne would never sing a song with lyrics that are Nickelback level insipid and include the word California in them, what, 9000 times. Did you bring in Anthony Kiedis to give a rewrite to your Nickelback songs?
The three surviving members of AiC who are currently in Jerry Cantrell's Band clearly have no respect for Layne, no respect for AiC fans and no respect for themselves. I've never wanted an album to bomb so badly in my life.
The entire thing makes me feel sick. If you'll excuse me I have to go listen to Dirt about a million fucking times to wash the foulness out of my ears and hopefully off my brain.
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