At least I hope so. While I wait for people to answer my questions I figure I'll take a minute to talk about a thing or two.
As those that know me will know, I love movies. Movies are second only to books for me as far as entertainment goes. I see a lot of movies and I do mean a lot. It will also surprise no one (as I will often rant about my feelings concerning genre snobs and their ilk) that I also love horror cinema. I don't say that with a disclaimer attached. I love horror cinema. Not all of it of course because just like everything else, most of it is bad and just like everything else it goes in cycles and follows trends. These cycles and trends are often not my cup of Mexican beer.
The high points make me all manner of happy (the "Golden Age" of the 30's, the rise of Hammer Studios, the ridiculously intelligent things like Psycho and The Haunting from the 60's, the very very beginning of the slasher craze) while the low makes me sad for the genre (the slide into total camp of the forties which while entertaining in itself was shameful considering, the middle and end of the slasher craze, the remake boom, the Japanese remake boom, and everything from the current "torture porn" thing with the sole exception of the first Saw). I could write pages and pages about this but no one would care so I won't.
Anyway, I'm hoping that with the obvious death of the torture porn thing (I don't know who made that name up but that's what all the reviewers call it so, whatever) the next wave will be started next Friday, continued the Friday after that and picked up on for a while.
Rob Zombie please save me from bad horror films.
His remake of Halloween opens this weekend. Normally I would be screaming for his head on a platter but he's Rob Zombie. I've read lots of interviews and he has a real respect for and deep knowledge of horror cinema. He actually called John Carpenter before signing on for this and Carpenter told him to make it his own. My hope is that he will fire on all cylinders and blow me away.
The week after, a movie called Hatchet opens up. It calls itself old school American horror. Please don't let me down. If both of these movies take off it could mean a rebirth of good horror movies after a pretty vicious dry spell. Even if you don't care (very likely) keep your fingers crossed for my sake. The hard part about liking all genres is that you have more things to suffer through when the cycles and trends go south.
Let us pray that Brother Zombie will deliver us to evil. Amen.
Oh and in other geek news, Matt Wagner has a new Grendel series starting in November. Just typing it makes me sexually aroused. Also I have a sentence for you:
Warren Ellis has a new series out called Doktor Sleepless: Future Science Jesus.
If that sentence doesn't do it for you then you may already be dead.
Monday, August 27, 2007
Monday, August 20, 2007
I am Leechor, Evil Master of Power Suction
1. Leave me a casual comment of no particular significance, like a lyric to your current favorite song, or your favorite kind of sandwich, maybe your favorite game. Any remark, meaningless or not.
2. I will respond by asking you five personal questions so I can get to know you better.
3. Update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. Include this explanation and offer to ask someone else in your own post.
5. When others respond with a desultory comment, you will ask them five questions.
Questions by Damo/CS/I don't update my blog or sign into ICQ anything like often enough.
1. What's your full name, and is there a story behind any of the names you were given?
Brace yourself for mediocrity:
Earl Stephen Collins. My first name came from my father. He hated it and didn't want me named after him but my mother was adamant (re: wouldn't shut up about it) so he agreed to name me that on the condition that they then pick a middle name for me (he had none) which would be what everyone called me with no exceptions. He did not tolerate people calling me by my first name. When translated, my name means something like Crowned warrior prince. I dig it. Except for the part where the name that everyone calls me is from a guy that was killed for his beliefs. Perhaps not the best way to pick a name for a child.
2. What are your favourite homemade and take-away foods, and how long have you loved each?
Homemade is far and away Mom's chicken and dumplings. I would kill a man that got between me and the kitchen when she makes it. Take-away I'm going to have to say steamed Maryland blue crabs (it counts as take-away says I). If you get them from the right place then you will know what love tastes like. Ask anyone that's tried them.
I have loved each since the first time I tasted them. Just like your sister. I'm kidding! Jeez, you touchy bitches..
3. Desert island jukebox: You're sent on a retreat to a body of sand in the middle of nowhere with two palm trees and a hammock; what CDs did you pack (your wallet holds... let's say... ten)?
I object to this question on the grounds that is is cruel and unusual!
*shakes fist*
I'm going to assume that I'm not going to be stranded there forever but only for an extended period but still, ridiculously hard question. Do I pack music to fit the locale or do I just take my favorites? Do I try to offset the locale in some way? AAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!
OK, in no particular order and I'm not going to explain why, here goes:
1. The soundtrack from Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
2. Led Zeppelin - How The West Was Won, Disc 1
3. Nude on the Moon - The B-52's Anthology, Disc 2
4. Faith No More - Either The Real Thing or Angel Dust. I'll flip a coin when it's time to go and choose then.
5. Johnny Cash - At Folsom Prison
6. Pink Floyd - Wish You Were Here
7. Alice in Chains - Dirt
8. Pantera - Vulgar Display of Power
9. Thelonius Monk with John Coltrane at Carnegie Hall
10. Depending on my mood, a really great Elvis or Beatles collection/best of/whatever.
4. What's your biggest achievement / proudest moment? Why? (if you can't come up with one, the question is "Why do you suck?")
I'm going to blow smoke up my own ass now and say that my biggest achievement is either reading my first novel at age three or first testing on a college level in sixth grade. I really am as smart as I say I am. Suck it.
5. Why oh why did you quit smoking?
You see even though I am ridiculously smart I am also capable of insane depths of stupidity. Case in point. I realized that smoking made me more relaxed and that I genuinely enjoyed it so of course I had to stop doing it and then go through the hell of withdraw followed by 2 and a half years (and counting) of almost never ending cravings. It's a wonderful display of exactly how much I hate myself really and thanks ever so much for reminding me.
Bitch.
2. I will respond by asking you five personal questions so I can get to know you better.
3. Update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. Include this explanation and offer to ask someone else in your own post.
5. When others respond with a desultory comment, you will ask them five questions.
Questions by Damo/CS/I don't update my blog or sign into ICQ anything like often enough.
1. What's your full name, and is there a story behind any of the names you were given?
Brace yourself for mediocrity:
Earl Stephen Collins. My first name came from my father. He hated it and didn't want me named after him but my mother was adamant (re: wouldn't shut up about it) so he agreed to name me that on the condition that they then pick a middle name for me (he had none) which would be what everyone called me with no exceptions. He did not tolerate people calling me by my first name. When translated, my name means something like Crowned warrior prince. I dig it. Except for the part where the name that everyone calls me is from a guy that was killed for his beliefs. Perhaps not the best way to pick a name for a child.
2. What are your favourite homemade and take-away foods, and how long have you loved each?
Homemade is far and away Mom's chicken and dumplings. I would kill a man that got between me and the kitchen when she makes it. Take-away I'm going to have to say steamed Maryland blue crabs (it counts as take-away says I). If you get them from the right place then you will know what love tastes like. Ask anyone that's tried them.
I have loved each since the first time I tasted them. Just like your sister. I'm kidding! Jeez, you touchy bitches..
3. Desert island jukebox: You're sent on a retreat to a body of sand in the middle of nowhere with two palm trees and a hammock; what CDs did you pack (your wallet holds... let's say... ten)?
I object to this question on the grounds that is is cruel and unusual!
*shakes fist*
I'm going to assume that I'm not going to be stranded there forever but only for an extended period but still, ridiculously hard question. Do I pack music to fit the locale or do I just take my favorites? Do I try to offset the locale in some way? AAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!
OK, in no particular order and I'm not going to explain why, here goes:
1. The soundtrack from Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
2. Led Zeppelin - How The West Was Won, Disc 1
3. Nude on the Moon - The B-52's Anthology, Disc 2
4. Faith No More - Either The Real Thing or Angel Dust. I'll flip a coin when it's time to go and choose then.
5. Johnny Cash - At Folsom Prison
6. Pink Floyd - Wish You Were Here
7. Alice in Chains - Dirt
8. Pantera - Vulgar Display of Power
9. Thelonius Monk with John Coltrane at Carnegie Hall
10. Depending on my mood, a really great Elvis or Beatles collection/best of/whatever.
4. What's your biggest achievement / proudest moment? Why? (if you can't come up with one, the question is "Why do you suck?")
I'm going to blow smoke up my own ass now and say that my biggest achievement is either reading my first novel at age three or first testing on a college level in sixth grade. I really am as smart as I say I am. Suck it.
5. Why oh why did you quit smoking?
You see even though I am ridiculously smart I am also capable of insane depths of stupidity. Case in point. I realized that smoking made me more relaxed and that I genuinely enjoyed it so of course I had to stop doing it and then go through the hell of withdraw followed by 2 and a half years (and counting) of almost never ending cravings. It's a wonderful display of exactly how much I hate myself really and thanks ever so much for reminding me.
Bitch.
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Yep
I had this whole insane rant typed up and ready to go when it hit me that I shouldn't and won't subject my friends who come here to my barely contained mental illness. I really just want to let the few that care know that it's bad today and looks to get worse before it gets better.
If you pray, then pray for me. If you don't then think happy thoughts or ask your overlords on the mothership to beam me down some peace. Anything you can spare.
Thanks.
If you pray, then pray for me. If you don't then think happy thoughts or ask your overlords on the mothership to beam me down some peace. Anything you can spare.
Thanks.
Sunday, August 5, 2007
My drink and the getting on of same
These days I'm mostly a social drinker. Saturday nights when I play poker I'll one or two beers to loosen up, three if it's been a really awful week. Some weeks require more than this. A lot more. After swapping calls and texts with a few people during the week we decided that this last week was one of those. A true shit week that seemed to have it in for us all. Clearly it was a sign. We needed to blow off some steam. To grab that pressure release valve and haul that sumbitch around hard and fast.
We quickly devised a clever and intricate plan which I will now share with you.
The Plan
1. Go out.
2. Drink.
3. Drink quite a lot more.
4. Give it a good hard think.
5. Decide on having more drinks.
6. WOOHOO!
It's a work of genius isn't it? You'd think that it's too elaborate for us to pull off and let me tell you we had our doubts. We thought it might be too big, too grand an adventure. I'll admit it, we were scared. But did that stop us? No! We bravely set out to make The Plan a reality.
My friends I am pleased to announce that we were successful beyond our wildest hopes.
I haven't been that hammered for long and long and, Maker bless me, there wasn't the slightest hint of nausea which is weird because we were packing away a wide variety of food. Highlights included the crab dip, jerk chicken, a variety of chicken wings and what's a party without some deep fried cheese? The Old Man was looking after me for sure and many thanks you wily and magnificent bastard. I haven't laugh that much or that hard for a very long time and I really needed it.
Note: when you're completely faced, never play pool against the designated driver. He'll cheat. Somehow when I was trying to break he made me miss the cue four times in a row. Sneaky git.
Anyway, I wouldn't normally bore you lot with a drunk story but I don't have many good nights (or days for that matter) and when I do I like to share. Also, I heartily recommend that everyone get a friend that you can collapse into a drunken heap with, arms and legs twined together like a string of Christmas lights that have been sitting in a box all year, and go to sleep with without any of the bullshit sexual tension that normally keeps people from that kind of thing.
Bonus: zero hangover.
We quickly devised a clever and intricate plan which I will now share with you.
The Plan
1. Go out.
2. Drink.
3. Drink quite a lot more.
4. Give it a good hard think.
5. Decide on having more drinks.
6. WOOHOO!
It's a work of genius isn't it? You'd think that it's too elaborate for us to pull off and let me tell you we had our doubts. We thought it might be too big, too grand an adventure. I'll admit it, we were scared. But did that stop us? No! We bravely set out to make The Plan a reality.
My friends I am pleased to announce that we were successful beyond our wildest hopes.
I haven't been that hammered for long and long and, Maker bless me, there wasn't the slightest hint of nausea which is weird because we were packing away a wide variety of food. Highlights included the crab dip, jerk chicken, a variety of chicken wings and what's a party without some deep fried cheese? The Old Man was looking after me for sure and many thanks you wily and magnificent bastard. I haven't laugh that much or that hard for a very long time and I really needed it.
Note: when you're completely faced, never play pool against the designated driver. He'll cheat. Somehow when I was trying to break he made me miss the cue four times in a row. Sneaky git.
Anyway, I wouldn't normally bore you lot with a drunk story but I don't have many good nights (or days for that matter) and when I do I like to share. Also, I heartily recommend that everyone get a friend that you can collapse into a drunken heap with, arms and legs twined together like a string of Christmas lights that have been sitting in a box all year, and go to sleep with without any of the bullshit sexual tension that normally keeps people from that kind of thing.
Bonus: zero hangover.
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