Monday, April 28, 2008

Who put this on?

It's on random!

I haven't updated for a ridiculous amount of time but I have good reasons, none of which I'm going to share. Neener.

How miserable do you think the very first gay person was? Think about it.

Did you ever notice that every time a rock station does a promo for itself it ALWAYS goes like this:
"We play the rock!"
*snippet from song you like*
"The rock!!"
*snippet from song you really like*
"THE ROCK!!"
*snippet from song you love*
THE ROCK!! NOW!!"
*plays absolutely shitty song you hate in its entirety*

I'm given to understand that I really am engaged now. I'm going to need some of you to attend or my side of the audience is going to look pretty pathetic. I'll keep you posted.

It bugs the ever lovin' shit out of me that Saturday is called Saturday. It completely clashes with the other days of the week. A day each for the sun and moon. Fine. Then days, in order, for Tyr, Odin, Thor and Frigg. ALL Norse. Then a day for Saturn. A roman titan. What the fuck, man? I demand that this be changed before it causes my head to explode. I've been stressing over it since childhood and I can't take much more. Write to your congressman.

It really pisses me off when people end every other sentence with "right now." I am so tired right now. I am really upset right now. I am so confused right now. Listen people, we all understand that you're talking about the present. If you just say "I am so tired." we won't assume you meant last week or three day from now. Y'see the fact that you said "I am" indicates the present tense. We don't need further clarification. Knock it the fuck off. Right now.

WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

Did you ever notice that if a piece of chocolate melts and then sets up again it tastes completely different? What's that all about?

Stop pronouncing the W in sword. It makes you sound like a moron and it pisses me off. Don't ask me why because I don't know, it just does.

Have you ever stared at the sky until it frightens you? Try it, it's awesome.

So far this year I have seen 53 movies from credits to credits. I have no idea how many partials. I watch a lot of partials.

I put my pants on both legs at once. Out of spite.

10 comments:

The Taco Prophet said...

I fucking love when you do these posts. It makes me happy in my no-zone. You might want to move now. My mommy is calling the popo.

Also, I put my pants on no legs at a time. So yeah.

The Taco Prophet said...

Also, it occurs to me that you might not know why I'm giggling about my mommy calling popo. My wife's parents, being of a different generation than I (or at least, that's the excuse I'm given), didn't teach her the correct terms for her anatomy when she was a child. It wasn't until she had her first sex ed class that she learned it was a vagina and not a popo.

Thank fuck she doesn't read your blog. If you know me and you just read that, you're pinky-sworn to secrecy.

Larriken said...

Gonna cost ya...

Tim said...

The only time the W in sword should be pronounced, is if you're doing a Sean Connery impression. But if you're doing that, you're saying "shwards" anyway.

Anonymous said...

Ultimate in lack of patience:

Uh-oh, yay, and how about Loki.

I want this book and so should you. Read the excerpt: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0385073534/

suyapi said...

So right now I'm writing right now about a message right now. In other words, neener back!

And I love me some random thoughts! Although now I'm trying to decide what Saturday should be called...

The Taco Prophet said...

Caturday, bitches.

Larriken said...

"So say we all!"

Unknown said...

I have been backing Saturday being changed to honor Loki for long and long. It's a shame he gets the shaft for the terrible crime of being smarter and more clever than everyone around him. Loksday for the win.

Taco, I'm sending the link to me blog to your wife as we speak. Neener.

Unknown said...

Well, me and my drinking buddy made one of those if we're not involved by blah date then we'll just get married things. Then we kept moving the date forward because of a general hopelessness of ever finding anyone worth a damn and now it's less than a year away and since we've both given up completely on finding anyone we're stuck with each other.

We appear to be in an all systems go kind of situation at this point. So...are you gonna come?