So tomorrow is Thanksgiving which is, I'm told, not just for huge turkey dinners and football. Doesn't sound right to me but I'll go with it for now. So in the spirit of the holiday I will put aside my usual angry ranting and share some positivity with you.
So far this year I have been thankful for:
Books that set the mind on fire.
Movies that demand you watch them over and over.
Music that can never be loud enough.
Comic books good enough to be given in college English courses.
Every lunatic (re: all of you) at the Preserve. I have extra holiday Poje for you all.
Boobs so big they make every shirt look tight. Truly thou art blessed and thanks for sharing.
Stick nun porn and long distance sauce Not It.
The wonderful bead man, Artie C, that protects me while I sleep.
Shotgun Sodomy DVDs.
Pictures of nuns in skintight rubber.
Godzilla.
Football. Football. Football.
HDTV.
Football on HDTV.
Laughing so hard it hurts your ribs.
The Daily Beast.
Lolcats.
xkcd
Ricky Gervais.
The insane fun of the Wii.
Yuengling.
Joss Whedon.
The end of Dubya's reign of stupidity being in sight at last.
Hot girl on girl action.
The four day work week. YAY!
Stale peanut butter fudge.
The divine Ray Lewis.
Chicks that know as much about sports as I do. It's fucking hot.
And obviously my family and friends.
Even though I tend to hate life and most of the things in it I can still find things to be thankful for. Weird, right? I know. Anyway for those of you that fill me with the warm fuzzies, I'm thankful for you. So thanks.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
I have one too and it's not all that special
I'd like to share a conversation I was involved in with you, mostly so I can share my pain. Please read to the end as it doesn't go where you think it's going to go.
Me (Seeing something about Sarah Palin): God, I can't stand her. I'm so glad they didn't get elected I can't even tell you.
Woman (who is overly religious): Me too. She shouldn't be anywhere near the White House.
Me: I know! She's such an imbecile! She comes off like a total airhead and that "I'm just a regular soccer mom" schtick is such an obvious put on it makes me physically ill.
Woman: Plus she's a woman.
Me: ...what?
Woman: Women shouldn't hold public office especially vice president or president. She should be home taking care of her family.
Me: What!? (Followed by an angry tirade against this completely ignorant and utterly offensive line of thinking.)
Here I have someone, a woman no less, telling me that no woman should be an elected official because she has no right to not be at home being a servant to her family. Actually no, servants get paid. It was her religion telling her this. Her stupid fucking religion. She's married to a worthless piece of shit by the way who she thinks is better than her based solely on the fact that he has, allegedly, a dick.
The pure ignorance of this line of thinking makes my head hurt. It robs me of coherent argument and leaves me red faced and shouting. Of course I already knew that religion poisons minds but when it leaps out at you when you aren't expecting it in ways that raise the bar for offensive stupidity it's like discovering it for the first time all over again.
I don't give a fuck what your magic book says, it's wrong. Not wrong like you like a band I don't and I call you wrong. Wrong like you saying the sky is brown or water is dry or Pi is 7.1972645. Wrong. Not opinion. Fact. You are wrong. For the love of all things how can people still think this way in the 21st century?
Eventually I remembered my rule and ended the back and forth. It's a good rule so I'll share it with you again. Arguing with religious people is like taking a head first run at a brick wall. When it's over your head will hurt and the wall won't have noticed you were even there.
Thank you, religion, for fucking up yet another otherwise intelligent person with your poisonous ignorance.
Me (Seeing something about Sarah Palin): God, I can't stand her. I'm so glad they didn't get elected I can't even tell you.
Woman (who is overly religious): Me too. She shouldn't be anywhere near the White House.
Me: I know! She's such an imbecile! She comes off like a total airhead and that "I'm just a regular soccer mom" schtick is such an obvious put on it makes me physically ill.
Woman: Plus she's a woman.
Me: ...what?
Woman: Women shouldn't hold public office especially vice president or president. She should be home taking care of her family.
Me: What!? (Followed by an angry tirade against this completely ignorant and utterly offensive line of thinking.)
Here I have someone, a woman no less, telling me that no woman should be an elected official because she has no right to not be at home being a servant to her family. Actually no, servants get paid. It was her religion telling her this. Her stupid fucking religion. She's married to a worthless piece of shit by the way who she thinks is better than her based solely on the fact that he has, allegedly, a dick.
The pure ignorance of this line of thinking makes my head hurt. It robs me of coherent argument and leaves me red faced and shouting. Of course I already knew that religion poisons minds but when it leaps out at you when you aren't expecting it in ways that raise the bar for offensive stupidity it's like discovering it for the first time all over again.
I don't give a fuck what your magic book says, it's wrong. Not wrong like you like a band I don't and I call you wrong. Wrong like you saying the sky is brown or water is dry or Pi is 7.1972645. Wrong. Not opinion. Fact. You are wrong. For the love of all things how can people still think this way in the 21st century?
Eventually I remembered my rule and ended the back and forth. It's a good rule so I'll share it with you again. Arguing with religious people is like taking a head first run at a brick wall. When it's over your head will hurt and the wall won't have noticed you were even there.
Thank you, religion, for fucking up yet another otherwise intelligent person with your poisonous ignorance.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
An open letter
Dear America,
To say we don't always get along would be understating it. I mostly find that we don't see eye to eye on, well, damn near everything. As a rule I have little to no respect for the majority of you and I make no bones about it and never try to hide it. I find you small, closed minded, willfully ignorant and painfully self involved.
But sometimes you surprise me. Sometimes you reach way down deep and pull something out that makes me think there's hope for you yet. And never let it be said that I'm too high and mighty to say so when it happens. It happened tonight. At 11:00 PM Eastern time I heard it announced that you had called out for the same change that I so desperately wanted. The same change that I could barely hope I would see.
Sometimes you do right by me and I'm not above saying thank you. So America, with complete sincerity and from the bottom of my heart, thank you. You bought yourself some respect from me and that's not easy to come by. Try not to waste it.
Yours,
-S
To say we don't always get along would be understating it. I mostly find that we don't see eye to eye on, well, damn near everything. As a rule I have little to no respect for the majority of you and I make no bones about it and never try to hide it. I find you small, closed minded, willfully ignorant and painfully self involved.
But sometimes you surprise me. Sometimes you reach way down deep and pull something out that makes me think there's hope for you yet. And never let it be said that I'm too high and mighty to say so when it happens. It happened tonight. At 11:00 PM Eastern time I heard it announced that you had called out for the same change that I so desperately wanted. The same change that I could barely hope I would see.
Sometimes you do right by me and I'm not above saying thank you. So America, with complete sincerity and from the bottom of my heart, thank you. You bought yourself some respect from me and that's not easy to come by. Try not to waste it.
Yours,
-S
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