There are some things that you'd think a full grown adult would be good enough at to do well all the time. Things like walking. This is not the case. I'm an experienced walker. Been doing it for decades. I've done it at home and school and work. I've done it for fun and under duress. I've done a lot of walking. A lot.
I still need practice apparently.
Today I was walking and there was a small and not at all steep ramp type thing and uh oh, twist, what the hell, thud. Down I went. Not a trip and then a few stumble steps. No no. I mean I went down. Full body splat on the ground. Now a different person might have gotten right up and gone on their way or more likely jumped up and looked around with that nervous thing people do when they feeling that weird shame thing I hear so much about.
Not me. I stayed down there. I gently put my head on the ground and decided to stay horizontal for a minute. It was quite nice really. Eventually I had to get up and then I realized that I had hurt one of my ankles. Again. I've had so many injuries to both my ankles that they are brittle now and prone to easy injury. So now I'll be hobbling around all limpy for a few days but I'll always have those precious moments of relaxation on the ground.
Good times.
6 comments:
Excellent. Now that you're limpy, I can cull you from the herd and have you for my very own.
You are not alone in this action, I too have done this. Only when I did it, it was in front of the entire jock community of my high school. I had no shame. I just layed there, in the middle of the gymnasium, and basked in the glory of my own klutziness. It was a beautiful moment. The fall I took was rather dramatic and my friends actually coined it "The McHugh". Ah memories...
I continue to wish I had been there to see and point and laugh, and when I come home for Christmas I will endeavor to re-create the scene by tripping you so that I can enjoy it face-to-face.
Until then, I will continue picture you resigning yourself to your fate ("Just stay down") and laugh.
Oh, how we laugh...
I'm all of the above, with the added bonus of having a total lack of spatial awareness in regards to my knees/shins/hips. I'm always banging them against something.
The following conversation is a common thing in the middle of the night at my house:
*walk walk walk*
*thud*
FUCK!
Tim, try walking around at night in a house where children live. Toys are like little plastic land mines in the dark. I have a pair of Birkenstocks reserved strictly for indoor use because no slippers I've ever found can hold up to the penetrating force of a stray Barbie doll accessory.
UPDATE!!!
Post a Comment